A happy childhood for you
I was preparing lunch yesterday before my my husband comes back from training.
It was an ordeal to cook while feeding my baby lunch. Halfway through cooking, she woke up and it was time for lunch.
I was in between frying pieces of chicken and feeding her at the dining area.
But at that moment, seeing her crawl all over the place, I found my peace.
It was the fact that I am seeing her growing up in front of my eyes, developping, thinking how to get down the small step at the kitchen, how to climb on everything, its gives me pleasure. How blessed Iam to be with her 24/7. I know for a fact, not everyone can afford this. It is a choice that I have made after a very long period of searching and contemplating.
I can say gladly that this is the right choice for me. Maybe I wouldn't have understood this choice before her presence, and I know there are many who don't agree with my choice but it is the best for Isabella and me.
Right at this moment, everything else can wait but my baby cannot.
She is my priority. I have grown up alone most of my life. My mother pursued Master study in the UK right after I was born which she had my nanny took care of me all the time until the moment she was free. Then, she passed away right after she sat her final exam. I grew up without a mother and my father juggled between being a father and a mother to me and working as a teacher. He was young and I could see he didn't know how but he did his best to raise me. He never gave up.
By the age of 6 years old, I could be left in the house alone, I knew where to get my food, eat and how to prepare myself to school. I waited for the morning bus every morning and came home to find my lunch being packed for me on the table.
By standard one, I knew how to iron my own clothes. Heck I even ironed my daddy's shirt without him noticing after seeing how tired he was. I understood the meaning of doing it all alone. I could fried my own egg which means I would never die of hunger. I talked to a stray cat which I named Mail Noh and shared my box of KFC in one of those lonely moment.
Every night during Maghrib prayer, daddy would be gone to the mosque with his hostel's students as he was a warden. He would continue with their extra classes, or warden's meeting or chasing them for night study time. Whatever he could be doing, I was alone imagining a giant rat or frog sitting under the sofa ready to get me once I step down.
My daddy said I was a very good girl, very calm and understanding. I never threw tantrum at all. If he told me that he didn't bring enough money to get something I wanted, I would smiled and say 'thats okay daddy. We'll buy it next time. I don't really need it anyway'.
Because I understood his hardship and I wanted to make it easier for him eventhough I was just at an age where kids rebel all the time.
Yes, I turned out very fine with straight A's and a medical degree to prove that.
So I don't understand why kids who have it all, family, parents time and devotion couldn't strive to do better.
It was not easy to be me. I vowed long ago that my children shall have a different childhood stories to tell. A happy and silly one. Kids should be kids for as long as they should. So, Isabella's happy face in seeing both her parents every morning and night is precious. One of us will always be with her. When I am off to work, her daddy will take care of her. He will drop by the clinic during break time and I will breastfeed her. I get to see her often and before she even starts to miss me.
Now that she knows her own mind, she is super duper affectionate and loving. Such a gentle baby. I shared with my husband that we have the power to decide how our child will turn out. If we wish for her to be gentle, we shall be gentle to her. If we want to raise a loving person, we shall be loving towards her. If we want to raise a happy girl, we shouldn't be angry at her. If we wish for her to be respectful, we shall not shout at her.